A year ago my focus was cultivating motel 6, slowly I lost that focus with other aspects of my life, routines faded finding myself "filling" my time. Something changed recently, my urge to find peace, but mostly expression in my home. The reality of growing up hit hard. Thirty is getting closer & closer. My fairy tale image of what my life should be is not. Does that mean I cannot have a home, no.
Last night, I intentionally hosted a dinner party, invested in a game and bought bottles of wine. Above my bed is a chandelier decal, slighty swinging, I'm hanging pictures, art and focusing on maintaining peace in my living space. It's not always about perfection, I am reminded of this daily. I am OCD, not the anal cleaner type, but the one who says if it's not perfect then why try. Breaking down that thought proccess is difficult. I know I have wonderful friends who help make my home a home, that the popcorn ceilings don't matter & I deserve to make myself a good meal.