Sunday, October 26, 2008


Last night was life changing. Well not really. But in an odd sense, something big happened. My friend N invited S and I to this party in West Seattle hosted by a gay Realtor from her work. Decked out in our "musical theme attire" we drank champagne prior to the party then headed to West Seattle. I kid you not this was like entering an alternate universe, some people decorate for Christmas, these men have Halloween down to perfection. A the gracious host gave us the grand tour which included telling us there was a palm reader. We laughed, that sounds like fun, then moved onto get drinks, eat delicious food and talk with N's co-workers. Incredible details in this beautiful West Seattle home, this for sure is not the college parties of my 20s nor what I'll probably be doing next Friday. We mingled, decided to wait in line to have our palms read, why not, the line was too long so we went back to the party. N and I infatuated with the food including the chocolate fondue fountain. So cannot wait for next years party- even got a preview of the theme. The line was shorter for the Palm Reader, it was close to mid-night, why not, we wait. We are the last ones in, wheee, he's tired but ready to read our palm lines. I go first.

He says wow, you have a LOT going on. I hope this isn't too personal, but you have a medical problem with your torso area, stomach-lower back, something isn't right. Damn, yup, my tummy, it bothers me. You need to fix this. It's causing you pain/stress. Ok yes, he's right keep on going. I'm starting to realize this isn't quite the fluff I had believed in the past. Next point, you have to do some self-acceptance, be confident in yourself, embrace yourself. You've recently acquired some power, in the past you've had several experiences that left you feeling powerless. Don't abuse the power, be strong but hold back a bit. Damn, he's pretty accurate. Next, you have great intuition about people, keep that to yourself, don't share it, that knowledge is powerful, rather sit back, let it come to you and process it. Woa.... this is getting a bit spooky. My lines come together (want to research this some more), this means I have something great to contribute to the world, I have something to give. Don't ignore that, what I'm doing right now is not related to what I have to give. I need to pursue those interests that fuel my soul, make me happy. Oh crap. Then one last note, keep writing, you are a natural editor. HOLY FUCK. This man just told me everything spot on going on in my life, my head. N and S were sitting there nodding, they knew all this. I have a full plate, a lot to accomplish.

He moves onto S (this is her own story to tell) and then N. Both were incredibly accurate- relationships, life etc. Things both have dealt with recently. Very very erie. Lastly he reads N's former co-worker J. Oddly he mentions all three of their love lives. After he finishes, I say, I have a question, you talked about their love lives, but not mine, why? He says it wasn't as strong for you. Has me lay out my hand. Tells me that I have more important things to focus on but love will come. Not to worry. Next, he says... "What the hell...." as he is observing my palm. Have you been in love before? No. Are you in a relationship? No. Have you been in a significant relationship? No. Are you sure? Well I have this friend, we are pretty close. Bam! This relationship is like a soul mate but not sexual. Yup. With a gay man? Yes. Let this person be your soul mate, its ok right now but know that in the future once you tackle the other stuff you will find a great love and it will knock your socks of anything you've felt before. You are worthy of being love and can give great love. You are damn sexy and beautiful, you'll be fine. You have quite a bit to achieve, your love life is the least of your problems.

This little party had just changed my life. A complete stranger accurately described most of my inner battles. He defined my life path. He doesn't know me, I said nothing to him, all I did was lay out my palm to him. Still trying to process the information. I didn't believe in any of this stuff til yesterday. Now, well, I'm convinced. I watched this man accurately describe all three of our lives, our battles- strengths and weaknesses. What does this mean for me? Well, it means to start focusing again on my health- my body, working out, eating right. To keep writing in Scrumptious Seattle. Learn my new management position. And most importantly, come into self acceptance. I've known all of these things. But I've been tasked. I know I want that great love he speaks of, but I have quite a bit to accomplish before I can find that soul mate. For now, I guess its M. (Oh and that doesn't mean I can't have sex and he says that's what Toys in Babeland is for! LOL). Contribute something great to the world? Damn.... what does that mean? Still a bit overwhelmed by the experience, but oddly feeling calmer. Lately I've been falling again into a middle depression. I feel a sense of purpose, greater than I've ever felt before. I have more of a sense of meaning to my life. Feeling a bit overwhelmed in the words of Sarah Palin, you betcha, but I see hope and change. I wonder if Obama has the merging of lines, what would a Palm Reader say about him? I will keep on writing.

Thank you N, for inviting me. Changing my life. Just realized I was supposed to go to Bellingham this weekend but M had too much homework, he pushed it back til next weekend. I believe there was a reason I went to this party, I was destined to go. I am honored to share the experience with two wonderful people in my life.

Sunday, October 19, 2008


I am confused by the male species. You give mixed signals. Granted us women are no better. However, recent endeavors with a particular dating site baffles me. For instance, this evening, a certain user messages me, apparently my picture of myself in a tankini was "something only old women and mothers wear," then proceeded to tell me he was turned on and would have sex in the kitchen with me. Oh and btw, I'm having an affair with a 22 year old Ukrainian woman. WTF??? Is this supposed to be a turn on? Are these the people I am destined to meet?

I am still looking to meet Mr. Right. I know he's out there, but please come out from hiding. There were two cute guys who walked into Baracktoberfest on Saturday, of course they sat alone, I didn't talk to either. Then there's the hot SW Board Member who used to be on Survivor that I have a sorta secret crush who happened to show up.

I have hope that things will be different. I need change just as much as we do in this country. I'm looking to go on a date. Not hook up with some random guy. Nor settle. I have expectations. And yes, a little sex would be nice too.

Saturday, October 18, 2008

Organic 101

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Building Community Roots

On Saturday my roots to my past and present community connected. I had the opportunity to go to Roy, WA to pick apples. I was initially excited about the prospect of picking apples, but of course when it was early Saturday I was not quite so enthusiastic. As we approached Tacoma I started to feel the same feeling every time I approach the city of destiny, a bit of longing but mostly love. Yes, I do love Tacoma. But this time I continued on I-5 towards 512 onto Puyallup. The last time I was in Roy was to re-charter an Explorer post, I didn't want to be there. As I drove past the fire station, I remembered my meeting, not exactly the most positive time in my life, rather survival. This past weekend my feelings toward Roy changed.

We were picking apples for the homeless. For The Emergency Food Network on an orchard maintained by the Korean Woman's Associated and formerly associated with Associated Ministries and Mother Earth Farms. These names all meant something to me. My heart grew bigger immediately as we heard the ED talk about their mission and focus. My roots in two very separate communities had just made a connection. The above mentioned names were closely connected with my former college and church I had worked. Although I was never directly involved with them, I knew about them, a former mentor/friend served on the board for several of the names- later talking with David, the Ed, he knew Jim and Nancy. We had commonalities.

This was the first harvest for the apples. They are organic. I had the special apple collector on and began one by one removing the apples from the tree. Saturday was the epitome of a fall day- cool, crisp and sunny. Apple picking was something we did almost every fall as a child. We'd pick apples, make apple cider and pies. Most importantly I was connecting to the earth on another level. It's different from hiking or going to the park. I felt fulfilled. Happy. I actually spent most of the time alone during the project. Talked briefly to a few. Mostly content spending time with mother earth, I was experiencing my form of spirituality, my version of church.

Our project was covered by the Tacoma News Tribune. The article about our Saturday of apple picking includes a quote by me. Unfortunately there are no pictures on the website.

After the project I took the team to the Harmon then had the opportunity to show a few people in my car some places in Tacoma. They joked that I needed to work for the Tacoma tourism council. I really do love Tacoma. Just like Neko in Thrice All American, my heart will always have a special place for the dusty old jewel in the south Puget Sound. Tacoma is my community, always will be an integral part of shaping the person I have become.

Thank you for bringing two very important communities to me together. My roots connected in a way I never expected them to, a wonderful surprise. I cannot wait to make a pie tomorrow with the handpicked apples.